“A happy bridesmaid makes a happy bride.”
-Alfred Lord Tennyson
I guess some ladies don’t agree with Lord Tennyson.
The absolute worst I noticed was those poor ladies in the gold dresses. Ugh.
And that is why I let Ree and Cayla pick their own dresses. I don’t want a miserable best friend and sister in law on my wedding day. No way.
Before I was in this boat, I’d always found it amusing that people - OK, women - get so worked up about looking “perfect” on their wedding day. Before I began planning my own wedding, I just figured I would change nothing about my physical appearance. Afterall, Tim had fallen in love with me looking the way I did, so why would I want to change that?
Then, of course, The Realization hit: People, hundreds of people, would be looking at me (us), taking pictures of me (us), commenting on how I (we) look.
Maybe some changes would be in order after all.
For me, it was like a kick in the butt to do things I’d been talking about doing, meaning to do for months or years, but had never gotten around to.
My hair was loooong, almost down to my butt. I kept it that way because it was easy, not necessarily because it was the most flattering ‘do for me. I chopped it off. Now, my hair length resides around my collarbone. I had gained a few (read: 40) pounds because of a medication I was on. So, I joined a gym, ate smaller portions and did something other than whine about it. I’ve worn glasses since high school. I finally went out and got contacts, which, I must say, are awesome.
Basically, I became a person I wouldn’t cringe to look at down the road in my wedding pictures.
To that end, I’ve also, like many brides do, hired someone to do my hair and makeup on my wedding day. Her name’s Kyra Dorman, and I wish she had a Web site I could link to because she’s awesome. She’s all the way in Greensboro, where my folks live, but I think she’s definitely worth the extra trek.
That’s the makeup and the front of what I’ll look like. Sorry for the shoddy picture quality, I took it with my cell phone camera.
That’s what the back of my hair will look like. I especially like the little braids Kyra interwove into my hair. I think this hair do suits me pretty well. From the front it looks like a classic chignon or bun, but then the back is this surprise of curls and braids. Awesome. Classic with a twist. I couldn’t have done a better job myself. You know, if I had the ability to do hair and stuff.
Ladies: Don’t be that bride.
Please.
I understand it’s “my daaaaayyyyy,” and you want it to be perfect, but there’s really not need to start trashing the band’s instruments, no matter how pissed you are they didn’t play “Under The Sea” quite the way you’d envisioned.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: 5, 10, even 1 year from now, none of that will matter. No one’s going to know that the music, flowers, linens weren’t exactly what you expected if you don’t tell them. They will, however, remember a bride picking up a steel drum and sending it flying across the room.
Don’t be that bride.
Enjoy your wedding. Enjoy being married to the one you love. Don’t sweat the small stuff. Please.
Today’s it. The end. Fin.
The deadline to R.S.V.P. to the Tim and Vanessa wedding is today.
Apparently, not everyone we’ve invited - all 160 or so of them - is aware of that. I guess not everyone is aware that they’re supposed to let us know regardless of whether they plan to show up or not. Though RSVP - which translates to “please respond” from the French reponder répondez s’il vous plaît - is printed politely enough, apparently a more aggressive tactic is required.
I’m beginning to agree with the author of “The Meaning of R.S.V.P.” Donna Pilato when she says people are either gettinge progressively more rude or they just don’t understand what R.S.V.P. means.
Just in case you fall in the latter category, it means respond regardless of if you plan on showing up.
I guess, though, there is a third possibility: The USPS lost or slowed down delivery of around 100 people’s responses. Hmm. Maybe.
So, Tim and I were lounging around before I had to get ready to head to work today when there was a knock at the door.
It was the UPS guy, with our first registry gifts!
Oh boy!
So, Tim had me open the box to find cutlery and steak knives.
Other girls aren’t as lucky. Or are luckier, depending on your point of view.
Naughty jokes from fellow brides? Oh boy!
Three women: one engaged, one married, and one a mistress, are chatting about their relationships and decide to amaze their men that night all three will wear a leather bodice S&M style, stilettos and mask over their eyes. After a few days they meet again…..
The engaged girlfriend said: ‘The other night, when my boyfriend came back home, he found me in the leather bodice, 4″ stilettos and mask. He said, ‘You are the woman of my life, I love you…then we made love all night long.’
The mistress stated: ‘Oh Yes! The other night we met in his office. I was wearing the leather bodice, mega stilettos, mask over my eyes and a raincoat. When I opened the raincoat, he didn’t say a word. We just had wild sex all night.’
The married one then said: ‘The other night I sent the kids to stay at my mother’s for the night, I got myself ready, leather bodice, super stilettos and mask over my eyes. My husband came in from work, grabbed the TV controller and a beer, and said, ‘Hey Batman, what’s for dinner?’
As much as I hope Tim and I - and our guests - have a good time at our wedding, I hope it doesn’t end up like this.
Although you have to admit it is kind of sweet that the bride and groom go from tripping and fighting each other to attacking the guests that try to help them. All together now: Awwww…
…
Note to all our guests: Tripping the bride is not allowed. I probably will throw a metal planter at you if you try.
Well, since people have been buying stuff off our registry, Tim and I decided to hit up Target and add more stuff.
It’s more fun than you’d think.
Anyone who’s worked retail before would recognize the “gun” they give you.
They allow you to go around the store zapping whatever it is you want. So, Tim and I did. And it was awesome.
We added video games (for him, clearly), TV shows on DVD, a huge collage frame to replace the ugly fabric thing he has over our sofa and much, much more. We were, you know, trying to get a good mix of things in different price ranges.
It’s sad to think we’re basically done with that. No more playing with the registry gun….
Until next time.
I think when setting up the guest list for a wedding, people have a tendency to go overboard. We want to invite everyone who ever once meant something to us, including our best friend from grade 5, even if we haven’t talked to them since grade 6.
I have to admit, I think Tim and I both gave into this, just a little bit. Nothing as extreme as the example I mentioned above, but high school friends and college friends we haven’t spoken to in a few years were definitely included. Of course, whether they come is up to them, but I think it was important to not sever friendships.
Which, of course, brings me to the next guest list issue: He wants to invite someone, and she doesn’t. We ran into this problem, and it came to a head last night. There’s someone on our guest list I really don’t care for, to put it nicely. Tim, however, is friends with this person’s significant other and wants to invite that person. But, they’re a pair. It blew up, but with today’s calmer mind, I saw his side. If he wants someone there, why shouldn’t they be there?
Besides, I’ll just come up with a sign a la Seinfeld in case this person decides to bug me. It’s my goal to not say more than “Thanks for coming” to this person on my wedding day. Hopefully, I’ll succeed.
The first purchases from our registry have been made.
It’s kind of an exciting feeling to see some of what we’ve asked for - flatware, nice sheets, steak knives - being crossed off the list.
Now, I know people don’t have to buy gifts when they go to a wedding. I understand that. But it’s kind of making the impending wedding seem more real. People don’t buy gifts 1 year, 9 months, 6 months before a wedding. They do it when it’s close. And, with 49 days and counting left, I’d say we’re definitely getting close.
Our only problem: Where do we put all this stuff in our tiny, one bedroom apartment? I guess we’ll just have to move.